Roommate
by LeaNicolaie
Summary: AU - Yagari has been forced into college and he's also forced to deal with his drama inducing roommates. Four guys under one roof really might just be too much. KanaZero and maybe YagaKuro


A/N: Hello all :D This is totally random crap. Seriously just for amusement. What ya see is what ya get. No hidden meanings anywhere (well, maybe) and no plot whatsoever. I just had this insane itch that demanded I put the characters in this type of setting. Still, I hope it's amusing.

Warnings? People are OOC. Some because I exaggerated one part of their character for personal enjoyment and others since i don't really know much about them besides the fact that they might be stoic bastards *cough*Kaito/Yagari*cough*

No own Vampire Knight.

* * *

**Roommate**

Yagari Touga, age nineteen, reluctant high school graduate, forcefully resigned (damn his boss and her spew of getting a useless degree – as if he gave a shit) set design assistant, and thus reluctant college student, almost let his face go slack enough to drop his cigarette when he opened the door to which he thought was his dorm room.

"Ka-Kaname, not here!"

"Where else if not here, Zero? You are lying on what will soon be your couch for the next three months in our dorm."

Obviously, he was quite mistaken. Right? He turned to give another glance at the door he came through. 609. He checked his form. 609. Hm.

"Kana – Nn…"

"So beautiful, Zero."

"Sh – ah! – shut up…"

He squinted his eyes. Nope. Still 609.

"Nn, n-not there, damn it, Kaname!" A particularly obscene wet sound soon followed with an equally obscene moan.

_Oh hell_, Yagari turned a faint shade of resigned green, nearly crushing the cigarette between his lips, trying to keep himself from heaving. His mental/physical health could not have deteriorated so fast. He felt at least a decade had been scraped off of his lifespan. Fuck, this was the stuff of nightmares. He didn't know what he'd been expecting when he came here, but it sure as hell wasn't this.

Luckily (for him) unlike his face, his fingers had no qualms about going loose, his hold on his large duffle bag giving way completely for it to fall to the floor with a loud 'thud'. The result was immediate. The two psychos both looked up and froze.

Yagari had never seen someone's hand move so fast, from sliding over a pale chest to smoothly pulling up a thin shirt over his…partner from the back of the couch. He did nothing to cover himself, however, uncaring of his naked torso or the obvious bulge in his pants as he turned to face him.

"Hello, and you are?" He asked, eyes expressionless and voice bland. Yagari doubted the guy would give a rat's ass if he puffed out his chest and called himself the queen of England.

The other one was too busy cursing up a storm looking ready to punch his…partner in the face. (At least this one had the grace to look a little unsettled at getting caught.) "Fuck, Kaname he's probably the new transfer!"

"I see. Yagari Touga, nineteen, freshman. Well, Yagari-san, if you would?" He made a vague gesture towards the door, wearing a polite smile that also said, "Leave or die."

And Yagari left. (Feet staggering, face pale, almost forgetting his duffel bag.)

* * *

Takamiya Kaito, also age nineteen, a successful sophomore, was currently engaged in banging the table with his fist, laughing his ass off, and suffocating due to lack of air. "No shit, really? On Zero and that arrogant asshole of his?" He gasped out, shoulders shaking. "You're lucky if you get through a week with them." He snorted, "but that's the perk of registering late for student housing," he sent Yagari a mock pitying look, "you poor bastard. There's a timing for everything, and you, quite obviously, totally missed yours."

Yagari could only respond in a sullen glare.

Taking a gulp of his coffee, Kaito smirked. "Well, if you ever need a break," and it was more than implied that he would be needing many, "you can take one here. You're free to use the floor." To his credit, the polished wood he gestured vaguely over his shoulder did look fairly clean.

Yagari resisted the urge let out a groan of agony. He might as well just move in at this rate. But there was a reason why he preferred not to be roomed with (he'd actually insisted that on his boss.) Kaito. As good as he was at being a friend, he was _not_ someone Yagari wanted to live with.

Though he didn't know if he made the right choice if those two were the other option. It was like having to choose between a lesser of two evils.

Seeing his expression, Kaito snickered. "Worse than the worst first impression, I know, but Zero's not bad. And Kuran? I'd rather be hit by a bus than deal with him."

By Kuran, Yagari guessed Kaito was referring to Zero's 'arrogant asshole'. The short description seemed fitting, from what little Yagari had gleaned. Just recalling the way he'd acted had Yagari taking a glance at his duffel bag, wishing he could've smashed the guy's face in with it, just to give him something to worry over.

In addition to that, they could also add in 'shameless sex addict'.

"At least you won't have to see them together during finals," Kaito shrugged. "Zero's with me in graphic design and our shit isn't easy to figure out, but it's more that Kuran's an architecture major, and I'm pretty sure you know how that goes." Architecture was serious business, during school at least. The number of classes they were required to take was, well, a lot. Yagari never bothered to look into specifics, already busy with his own interests.

"It's _after_ the finals that you better go for some mufflers or sleeping pills," Kaito smirked. "You won't get any sleep otherwise; trust me."

Yagari's expression had him snorting and pushing a glass of coke across the table in a sad attempt at comfort.

* * *

When he finally decided he was ready to go back to his dorm, he stayed clear of the bedrooms and logically went for a safer zone, the kitchen,

"Oh! A new roomie! I'm Kaien, nice to meet you!"

Which already seemed to have an occupant.

Yagari's eyes trailed up the arm of the offered hand and came to a stop at bright auburn eyes peering up at him through a pair of clear lenses. A straight nose, plump pink lips… Yagari paled. Sure, the guy was now sporting a pair of fitting glasses this time, but he would never mistake that face!

Urgh…and he thought the two idiots he met earlier had been bad… This was infinitely worse. So much worse. Heaven have mercy on him worse. It was so embarrassing he thought he could cry. Well, no, not cry, he supposed, but close enough. This…this was mortifying.

But what was more pathetic was that he hadn't been able to get over it even after all these years. Yes, it was humiliating he wished he had selective amnesia or something, but he should have been able to laugh about it by now, it was so long ago. Cross didn't even remember him; from the way he'd introduced himself. That was how long it'd been. And here he was, freaking out about it like it just happened yesterday.

Yup. Pathetic.

Taking another weak glance at Cross' face, he tried not to let it be overlapped by the image of a young boy, wide-eyed and adorable, long ash blond hair in curls…

"Are you…all right?"

Whoa, Yagari leaned back. Too close! Cross' face was now inches from his own. The hand that'd been outstretched for a handshake was now raised in concern, probably about to go for a comforting pat on his shoulder. Yagari quickly shook his head to show there was no need for worry and hastily blurt out his name, trying to keep his eyes focused on a hello kitty cup on the counter.

"Touga-kun, then," Cross smiled hesitantly, seemingly still concerned, but stepped back further into the kitchen to flounce about and continue his business before Yagari had interrupted him. He reached for the pink cup and stuck a tea bag into it, pouring in some hot water.

Smiling more genuinely this time, he sat at the small table and gently dunked the tea bag in and out by its string, adding a bit of sugar from the porcelain baztmaru jar on the table. He gestured for Yagari to take a seat across from him, reaching for the large tub of cream cheese that'd already been taken from the fridge, and, using the spoon he just had in his tea, scooped a generous amount and swiped it on one of the crackers that'd also been laid out.

As Yagari decided to sit, Cross looked up and grinned impishly, leaning his chin on the palm of his hand, the other holding the cracker to his lips as he took a bite. Several strands of long pale, ash blond hair fell loose from its bun as he tilted his head, which was dangerously coming close to collapsing completely with only a pencil placed precariously in between to hold it together.

"Soo…" He dragged the word out playfully, "have you met Kaname-kun or Zero-kun yet?"

Yagari glared. Cross laughed. "Ah, thought so," he hummed knowingly. "Well, you're not the first that's walked in on them. Welcome to the club," he gave a one-sided toast with his half-eaten cracker, a few tiny crumbs landing on the table. "Since you recognized their names, I guess you also heard an earful," he grinned. "You'll probably hear a lot about them once people find out you're our roomie, but I hope you don't switch out like all the rest. It's been a while since we've had a fourth person around for longer than a week." He sighed dramatically.

"_You'll be lucky if you get through a week with them."_ He'd thought Kaito had just been exaggerating, but it seemed his halfhearted joke had a bit of truth to base it on. Could they be such terrible roommates, though? The only down side Yagari could see so far was the couple he'd been so uniquely introduced to (if that could even be considered as one) and he knew he'd get over his past issue with Cross soon enough, especially if he was going to see him everyday from now on.

He could also trust Kaito's word on Zero 'not being bad' and Cross seemed an okay guy. He could tell Kuran wasn't the type to make nice with complete strangers, but Yagari wasn't expecting to get along with everyone, and he could deal with an asshole or two. He at least had enough practice from the time he spent with his boss.

Things could be worse, he told himself.

"Sempai, do you have any spare lube?" A voice called, and their tone implied asking for things like lube out loud wasn't anything out of the ordinary.

If he dared, Yagari would have rammed his head against the table. Instead, he opted for briefly closing his eyes and praying for patience. Things could be worse, he reminded himself.

"Flavored or non-flavored?" Cross sent him an amused smile as he asked casually. Yagari managed to send him another glare.

"You know which type Kaname likes to – oh, shit, sorry." Lilac eyes went wide and pale cheeks flushed with embarrassment. "Crap. Um, sempai, I'll just talk to you later," Zero bid a hasty retreat from the small kitchen. But not even a few seconds later, he stuck his head in again, his face even more inflamed as he stammered out, "Yagari? Sorry you had to see that. Before, I mean, with the—" He waved his hand pathetically. "Yeah… Um, sorry," he ducked his head and dashed out, ignoring Cross' laughter.

Chuckles dying down, Cross dunked one of the crackers into his tea, "Ah, Zero, he's the cute one, a fluffy bunny on the inside, really. You couldn't tell with the way he normally acts around everyone else, but you'll see that for yourself soon enough if you haven't already." If his gaze looked particularly piercing as he mentioned this, neither of them said a word.

Yagari just gave a vague nod, wishing he had some sort of hearing deficiency. Either that, or some way to make his brain more selective with what information it processed. He'd almost blurted out, "You know what _lube_ your roommate likes?" But before that, "You keep spare lube around?!" Remembering his boss' devilish smirk when he mentioned he'd be rooming with three other guys, he made a mental note to give her hell once he got back.

"Sempai, are you in?" Another voice called, this time a girl's. What now? Yagari grimaced.

"Yuuki," Cross smiled as the girl stumbled in, "what is it?"

"You got any extra tea bags? You know, the really good ones you gave me last time? It's good for my cramps and I'm dying from them right now." The petite girl made an exaggerated expression of despair, clutching at her lower stomach. "My roommate tried to give me ginger ale, but you know how well _that_ goes down," she scowled, as though all the pain she was currently going through was due to her incompatibility with carbonated drinks.

She was cute, he vaguely noted, in a childish Lolita-esque way, with her big doe brown eyes and long dark hair, that Yagari had no doubt probably attracted some middle aged men to try to enact their perverted fantasies on.

"Right, right," Cross stood from his seat and went rummaging around in the cabinets once again, puling out a small box. "I think this was it. Why don't you take a seat and have some here?" He offered with a smile.

He'd hardly finished his question before Yuuki collapsed side ways on the nearest chair, letting out a relieved groan. "Monthly dues are a right bitch," she muttered, "I don't know why mine are so bad." She turned to take some of the crackers and blinked at Yagari. "Oh, sorry, are you the new roomie?"

He just grunted out a yes, turning his attention to a mark on the wall.

"Looks like you got a keeper, sempai," Yuuki called to the blond before turning back to him. "Did you meet Zero and Onii-chan yet?"

His glare was enough of an answer. She let out a snort before wincing and rubbing her stomach.

But wait. Yagari froze. Onii-chan? "He's your brother?"

"Yeah I know, oh woe is me," Yuuki rolled her eyes. "You don't know how glad I was when he found Zero again." She bit into a cracker. "He saw him once after five years and it was like, 'Bam!'" She smacked her hands together, "The hormone engines went on max and he suddenly had a sex drive to rival Zeus or something."

"And you thought that was _good_?"

She narrowed her eyes. "He spent seventeen years without doing _any_thing, I'll have you know, seventeen _years_. And he's a guy!" She winced again, resuming her rubbing. "It just wasn't natural. Our parents thought he was going to die like an old cat lady," she shook her head. "We were all happy to see he had passion for special activities in the bedroom rather than have none at all." She shrugged. "We owe all that to Zero," she nodded. "Just for that, our parents are totally in love with him."

"Now, now," Cross smiled, "Kaname-kun wasn't that bad. He was just very focused on his schoolwork. That's by no means a bad thing."

"_I_ didn't think that, Mom and Dad did," Yuuki corrected, taking another cracker. "I was more worried about the FC girls. I know they stuck around as long as they did because they thought Onii-chan would stay single forever," she snorted. "They were like demented harpies on crack when they found out he was going out with someone, but when they found out he was going out with a _guy_," she emphasized the last word with much relish, "now _that_ was frickin' great!" The next bite she took form her cracker was particularly vicious.

"Ah, but you remember Aidou-kun?" Cross' seemingly innocent question had all the effect of a fist smashing through a beautiful wedding cake.

Yuuki suddenly turned pale and slowly set her cracker down, eyes shadowed. "Yeah… And don't say it like he's a thing of the past, cause he's _still_ around," she muttered. "Even Kaito sempai felt sorry for Onii-chan and he hates his guts."

Cross smiled wryly, setting the freshly made tea down along with a spoon. "I do admit, the underwear and the rubber chicken incident was going a bit far…"

Yagari shot out of his seat. He could take no more of this weird shit and heard way more than he'd like about his roommates' lives than he cared. He felt he endured more than enough for a day and retreated to his bed, setting about unpacking his things before the other two came back.

Taking a short glimpse at the bed across from his own, he was glad their sleeping quarters were divided in two, with Kuran and Zero in one and he and Cross in the other.

* * *

The next day had him grimacing as he stood face to face with one Kuran Kaname right as he was about to step out of his shared bedroom. "What?" He groused, wanting for some breakfast and wondering whether waking up earlier would have been better if only so that he might have had the chance to miss what was most likely going to be an unpleasant confrontation.

"I would like to have a few words with you on what you saw yesterday."

"Your…relationship isn't exactly a secret," Yagari said slowly, assuming Kuran wanted to warn him about telling others about what he saw.

The upperclassmen merely raised a brow. "I know," he said just as slowly, in a way someone else might say, 'Duh, idiot.' "I am here to give you my sincere apologies for your obvious discomfort regarding the actions of Zero and I. I suppose we should have been more discreet, what with expecting a new student to our dorm."

Sincere apologies his ass, Yagari nearly sneered. Kuran hardly sounded he meant any of the bullshit flying from his mouth. Remembering Zero's embarrassed apology the day before (which was definitely a lot more sincere than this one), his eyes narrowed. "That boyfriend of yours set you up to this or some crap like that?"

"Or some crap like that," Kaname answered smoothly. "Zero is fairly upset about upsetting you, and it…irks to me to see him so occupied about something so significantly below him." That same polite smile was back, except this time, it said, 'Do or die'. "I ask that you put his irrational fears to rest so that the rest of us may spend our days more pleasantly." And there was no question as to the kind of 'pleasant days' he was looking forward to.

Shameless sex addict indeed.

Yagari tried to contemplate how a 'sincere apology' could end up with the bastard asking him for a favor (or more like ordering), and decided he needed a smoke or a good cup of coffee before complying with any of Kuran's demands.

"I'll think about it," he muttered lowly, moving to go around the irritating man to the small kitchen. He bet the other chose to harass him the moment he woke just to catch him off guard.

His eyes widened, however, upon seeing what was going on in the kitchen.

"Sempai, what are you doing? Out!" A furious Zero commanded, pointing a finger. "You know how picky Kaname is about his food. I can't have you sticking weird things in it. He's enough of a princess as it is without complaining about his 'delicate digestive system'," he said sarcastically, flipping what Yagari guessed was an egg roll.

"Yes, yes," Cross said dejectedly, slumping into his seat at the table.

"If you want to experiment,"

"Do it with your own food," Cross finished with a small smile. "I'm sorry Zero-kun."

"It's fine," Zero responded absently, his attention on another pot, lifting the lid to check the contents inside before lowering the heat. "I know you wanted to impress our new roomie. Yagari, right?"

Yagari blinked as he heard this. Cross had wanted to cook for him? What for?

His past…'issue' suddenly springing to mind, he forced his blood to recede before it could make its presence known on his face, and tried to glare instead. (Not for the first time he wondered if that should just be his default expression. That way, even if he _were_ riding on an emotional rollercoaster, no one else would be privy to it.)

"Ah, yes," Cross seemed sheepish, but otherwise not at all embarrassed or affected as Yagari was, much to his chagrin. "As a good welcoming gesture. He passed out rather early last night, and I thought he'd be hungry."

"I didn't pass out," he narrowed his eyes, cutting into the conversation, "I was just tired. And I can make my own breakfast," he added, keeping his gaze off to a spot on the wall.

"Touga-kun, good morning! Did you sleep well?"

Zero spared him a glance and a nod before going back to the food.

Yagari answered Cross' question with a non-committal grunt as he sat down across from him. Taking another moment to glance at the counter, he saw that Zero was now pouring miso soup into a bowl and placing a few slices of the egg roll onto a separate dish. Just as he was scooping some rice, Kuran entered, taking the seat next to Cross.

Zero placed the food in front of him without a word, seemingly ignorant of his lover's warm smile as he went back to the counter. Yagari was amazed the bastard could even manage such a genuine expression.

"Yagari, you don't mind rolls or the soup?"

"Both are fine," he answered, "thanks." Zero didn't have to make his share, but he had.

"It's alright. If you don't like it, you don't have to finish it," Zero shrugged, bringing their food on a tray. Yagari vaguely wondered where the mortified boy from yesterday who couldn't even speak properly went.

Taking a seat next to him, Zero took up his chopsticks. Yagari was amused to see Kuran hadn't touched his food until he saw that Zero had started eating. He'd never met a couple so fixated on each other. Every time he heard them speak, it was to say something about their lover.

Zero didn't seem the type to cook often, but he did so, so that Kuran could have a comfortable morning, and Kuran, as rude and fucked up as it'd turned out in the end, came to 'apologize' (probably something _he_ didn't do often) so that Zero wouldn't feel so guilty.

Whatever they did, it always involved the other, especially in Kuran's case.

It was…endearing and commendable in a sickly sweet way that Yagari would have scoffed at, but secretly, was also fascinated by – the type of balance Zero and Kuran were so natural at keeping. It seemed they didn't even have to think about it, they just did it. It was their norm.

Even now, Zero was leaving a piece of his roll on his plate, which Kuran took without a word, happily stuffing his mouth with a light hum, finishing the rest of his rice. Whether leaving his food had been deliberate or not, Yagari wouldn't know, but Zero sure seemed just as happy watching Kuran eat.

Hearing a giggle, he looked over at Cross who was trying to muffle his laughter by piling food into his mouth. As he nearly choked on it, Yagari raised a brow. Eating when you're about to laugh was a bad idea. Cross took a swift sip of his soup and licked his lips, smiling sheepishly.

"Cute, aren't they?" He finally mouthed, glancing over at the couple. Yagari snorted.

"Every morning?" He mouthed back. Cross nodded, a few locks straying from his bun to frame his face.

His eyes strayed to Zero and Kuran once again, as though he couldn't keep his gaze away.

Yagari pretended not to notice the longing wistfulness he saw well hidden behind a thick filter of amusement and lighthearted cheeriness.

* * *

"Cross Kaien? The junior? Yeah I know him," Kaito peeled the plastic wrapping off of another slice of cheese, nibbling on its corner. "He's the Roommate. The 'only living human that knows how to live in harmony with Zero and his bastard.' Who _doesn't_ know him?"

"He's…he's _him_." Yagari muttered out.

Kaito blinked, taking another nibble before his eyes bulged and he said slowly, his voice low, as if they were criminals on the run, "You mean _him_? From grade school?"

"Yes," Yagari ground out, "that him."

Kaito's lips twitched. "Mm," he turned back to his cheese, "that him. Right. _That_ him. Cross Kaien…" He 'coughed' loudly. "I think I need to use the bathroom."

Yagari glared. "Laugh all you want. Why hide now?"

Kaito proceeded to bury his face into his arm, shoulders shaking. "Y-your life is like a shojo manga, you realize that, right?" He choked out. "A gay couple and grade school crush as your roommates? God loves you."

"Your commentary was unnecessary."

"You walked into that one," Kaito nearly giggled. "But Cross Kaien? Are you sure it's him? How long ago was it? It could be anyone with blond hair and glasses."

Yagari shook his head. "No, it's him. And he wasn't wearing glasses back then." He wouldn't mistake those eyes or that smile or that hair…

Kaito sent him an exasperatedly fond look. "I stand corrected. It's probably not just a grade school crush if you still remember him that well." He certainly didn't. He even shared some classes with Kaien and hadn't noticed.

Yagari refused to acknowledge the implications of Kaito's words.

"Wait a minute," the cheese nibbler suddenly frowned, "Does he know _you_?"

Yagari sent him a flat stare. Kaito smirked. "Tough luck."

* * *

"If you're looking for Kai-sempai, he's not here," Zero spared him a glance when he got back.

"Why would I be looking for him?"

Zero shrugged. "You're always with him. I figured you wanted to see him. I doubt you'd even want to stay here if not for that." He sent him a half wry, half apologetic smile as he rolled up one of his assignments, struggling to get a rubber band around it before it unfurled once again.

"I'm not—" Always with him, he wanted to say, but paused. Was he? Zero wasn't one to exaggerate and he seemed genuine, if only for the fact that Yagari's supposed choice in company didn't directly involve him and was thus unafraid of giving out his own opinions.

"Sure you are," and here, he sounded as though he were stating a causal fact. "I know we're all busy with our own share, but it's pretty obvious when we're eating together." He made a slight frustrated noise as the rubber band still refused to go on, and hissed as it snapped against his fingers on one of his failed attempts, turning his milky white skin (how someone managed to stay _that_ pale at nineteen, Yagari didn't know) an irritated red.

Having lost his grip on the poster, Zero just let out a defeated sigh as he looked down at his uncooperative assignment, shaking the pain out of his hand. The rubber band hung from his fingers on his other hand like a limp noodle.

Yagari raised a brow and was about to ask why not use tape instead when his eyes caught onto what exactly was on the poster.

"Is that…?"

"Mm?" Zero picked up his piece and began rolling it up for another try. "Yeah, I used Kai-sempai as a model. He fit into the range of the homework I had this week." Looking up at him, he paused before smiling and letting go of the poster to lay it out on the floor. "Do you think I did him enough justice?" His expression told Yagari he was merely being playful, but the smoker nodded seriously all the same.

"It's perfect." He wanted to say.

If he'd looked up, he'd have seen the sympathetic smile on Zero's lips, but his eyes were rather intensely focused on the image before him. "I'm glad you like it," Zero said softly, his tone lined with warm understanding. For what, Yagari didn't know.

* * *

The next morning, Yagari was surprised to see breakfast already on the table without said cook to eat it with. Both Zero and Kuran seemed to be elsewhere (though where they would go this early in the morning, he'd no idea).

"Oh!" He turned to see Cross pause in surprise, his arm in mid motion from rubbing his eyes. Fixing his glasses in place, he blinked as though taking a second look would make him see things differently. "Was this Zero-kun's doing?"

Yagari shrugged, taking a seat.

Cross smiled, walking around the table to his own place, taking a glance at every dish. "Looks like it was a joint effort." He giggled. "Some of these are definitely Kaname-kun's dishes."

"Kuran can cook?"

"Oh, I suppose you wouldn't know," Cross hummed, picking up his chopsticks, "He hasn't stepped foot in here to make anything since you came." He took a bite of his rice. "Usually, Zero-kun and he take turns, but Kaname-kun has been so busy lately, Zero-kun filled in."

"Why make the effort? Can't they just go down to the cafeteria if it takes up time?"

Cross shook his head. "You've seen how they're like," his eyes were fondly adoring, "can you imagine Kaname-kun going for food made by someone he doesn't know, and Zero-kun letting him, when he knows Kaname-kun would prefer not to?"

The smoker shifted uncomfortably, fixed on shoveling food into his mouth. Whenever Cross got into talking about Zero and Kuran as a couple, it made things awkward, at least for him. He didn't mind hearing about them so much anymore (at first it was all he could do to not run for the bathroom, getting reminded of his initial meeting with them), but he could see it both caused happiness and pain for Cross to discuss.

He was genuinely glad Zero and Kuran had each other, but while that was true, it was obvious he wished for the same, and the lovers' interaction only served to remind him of what he didn't have. Yagari suspected it didn't really pertain to the romance necessarily. When he thought about the things Cross mentioned about them, he concluded the junior just wanted someone who _understood_ and _accepted_.

Both Zero and Kuran weren't like most young lovers he'd seen (despite Yuuki and Kaito's mention of their healthy sex life), that simply dated because they felt physical attraction at first or even out of friendship. It was something deeper that tied them together and the rest just seemed to follow, an unbreakable bracelet with extra flattering trinkets.

He could also see where it could be a little unhealthy to be so attached, however, especially when it came to certain rumors that surrounded the couple. Just as Cross had warned, there were many that had their own opinions regarding Zero and Kuran and what sort of relationship the two shared.

But in the end, rumors were just rumors, and most (the females) tended to idolize the lovers' strong connection with each other, wishing for a similar relationship. 'If only I could have someone so caring and loving…etc.'

For Yagari, it was actually rather disconcerting to see the possible depth of the feelings one had for the other. It was…well, he wouldn't go so far as to call it unnatural, but as much it seemed to benefit them, the amount of dependency they had between them was a concept that was near unfathomable to Yagari, who prided in his secure independence. He couldn't dream of being so emotionally reliant on someone else.

"Touga-kun? You're not eating?"

Yagari immediately reached for some spiced pickled vegetables if only to get the concerned frown off of Cross' face. Chewing sullenly, he wished he were as tactless as some of the idiots he was unfortunate enough to know. He wouldn't have to worry about offending Cross then when he told him he should just stop talking about Zero and Kuran if all it did was work to put that shadow in his eyes.

Whether that was out of frustration in not wanting to see Cross less than content or out of anger in his inability to make him happier, he'd no idea.

"You know…this is rather rare of them," Cross commented, mentioning them _again_, "they usually never leave this way. I must admit it's a bit lonely."

Lonely? Yagari pursed his lips against the slight – totally ignorable – sting those words invoked and continued to bring food into his mouth almost mechanically. What did he have to feel hurt about? He already knew he wasn't the best company during any time of the day, much less in the morning before his coffee and smoke. (And those only served to make him more alert; it didn't soften his attitude or harsh visage.)

As his boss was inclined to say, he was a miserable lone wolf who didn't wish to be any other way, and until recently, he'd fully believed it. Other people (like his boss) had to fight tooth and nail to keep up resistance to his pushing to the point where they were too used to it to care. 'An acquired immunity', quoting another one of his colleagues.

"…and there was once when Zero-kun had this—"

"M'done." Roughly pushing his chair back, he made quick work of washing the dishes at the sink and left them on the rack before turning to exit back to his room.

Dumping himself onto his bed, he let out a low groan. What the hell was that? Sighing, he forced himself to never mind it and put his arm over his eyes, his other hand blindly reaching for the cigarettes he knew were placed nearby.

Once his fingers came in contact with the familiar stick, his stuck it between his lips and now scrabbled around for his lighter, reaching higher and wider, most likely looking a bit ridiculous from a bystander.

"Here."

A hand gently grasped for his own, placing something on his palm. Absently bringing it above his eyes, he blinked up at a bright orange lighter spotted with toothy Halloween pumpkins.

Turning, his eyes widened at an amused looking Cross and scrambled to sit up, forcing a blush down at the light laughter he caused.

"What do you want?"

The smile died down and Yagari's frown turned even harsher, though it wasn't Cross he was angry at.

"I just thought you'd want something to light that with. You always come back in here to take some time to yourself after breakfast."

He pursed his lips. He was _not_ happy the upperclassman took notice of his morning schedule. He wasn't.

"…Thanks."

"…Touga-kun," and the way he called his name was still the same, whether he remembered or not, "I…I'm sorry if I said anything to offend you just now, at the table—"

"You didn't."

"So I—what?" Auburn eyes blinked at him from behind those clear lenses. "But you seemed…well, mad."

Yagari's crystal blue eyes slid to meet Cross' slightly startled ones. "I always look mad."

Cross blinked at him again before he burst into laughter.

"…"

"Always look mad?" He chuckled. "You don't always look mad, Touga-kun." His smile gentled in a way that made Yagari want to tear his eyes away. "Even now," he leaned forward, "you look more confused and scared than mad to me," he said softly.

Yagari nearly bit off the cigarette, his hand still clenched tightly around the cheery lighter.

"Touga-kun—"

There was a loud bang of the door slamming open. The two men blinked in surprise.

"Ugh! I don't think I need to tell you this, but you make one really fucked up girl, Onii-chan, you know that right?" Undoubtedly, that was Yuuki.

Once her words registered completely, they both shared a wide-eyed look, their recent tension near forgotten. Did they just happen to overhear what they thought they overheard? Kuran Kaname – dressed as a girl?

"This doesn't flatter me in any way?" Surprisingly, at least to Yagari, Kuran sounded more curious than offended.

"How should I say this? Uh, NO."

There was a loud sigh. "I suppose it does seem awkward…"

"_Awkward_? You're trying to look like a girl at six foot two with that body and all you can say is that you look _awkward_?" Even Cross seemed to agree, looking embarrassed on the brunet's behalf.

And there was a moment of silence before, "Ka-Kaname…?"

Cross and Yagari shared another glance. That had definitely sounded like Zero. This was about to get interesting.

"Kaname, what are you doing?" His voice was tinged with helpless incredulity.

"I thought you'd like it."

"I don't." He couldn't have sounded more certain of something. Cross winced in silent sympathy at Zero's blunt answer. Yagari had to refrain from snickering too loudly.

Another moment of silence ensued with Yuuki's guilty laughter in the background.

Zero finally broke it with a soft sigh. "I like you as you are, Kaname, and cross dressing is not something you're in to. It doesn't suit you."

"Mm, you are right, of course."

"So take those off and put on Kaname-clothes. I don't know where you got them from, but you need to return them."

"Yes Zero."

"But before that," and here, Yagari suddenly turned green at the obvious signs of a heated kiss. "Nn…cherry gloss?" Cross sent Yagari a worried glance as they heard another wet smack of lips. "You know what, forget the Kaname-clothes and just wait in our room." Zero's voice was recognizably deeper. "And keep the makeup."

Yuuki giggled.

"Mm, of course Zero." There was the soft click of a door closing.

Yagari snorted. Cross practically collapsed to the floor in his laughter.

"Yuuki…" Zero's tone raised inquiringly.

"I don't know, Zero, I really don't. I'll try to find out though."

"Thanks. He's…never done this before."

"I can see that." She sounded dry.

"Did you do the make up?"

"Yep."

"Good job." Yagari hadn't known how much emotion could be put into two small words.

Yuuki huffed proudly. "You bet it is! Well, even I have to admit I had good stuff to work with from the beginning, so it didn't take much."

"I know." Yagari didn't doubt he did.

As the two eavesdroppers heard the other two leave (Zero to deal with Kaname and Yuuki out of their dorm room), Yagari and Cross shared another glance.

"Three hours." The smoker stated.

"Two." Cross countered.

"Two and a half."

Cross paused before nodding and shaking hands with him. "We come back in two and a half to see if they're done."

* * *

Yuuki laughed hysterically, barely managing to safely place her cup down. "You guys did _what?_" She choked out. "And of course sempai would win; how long do you think he's known them?"

"How long?"

"Since junior high, my friend, since junior high." She shook her head, grinning. "Of course, since Zero moved right afterward, it's not like he knows him any better than me." She tapped her chin. "But if you want to get technical, he's known them for around seven years now."

Seven…

"He's also the one who had to deal with Onii-chan during his 'Aftermath'," Yuuki sighed.

"Aftermath?"

"Mm," she hummed, nibbling on a Pocky stick, "after Zero left, Onii-chan kind of zipped through school in a daze. Sempai was the one who got him back on track by getting him to meet with Zero for a few days for 'recharging'."

Yagari fell to a contemplative silence. "How long has the idiot couple known each other?" He asked, trying to keep the frown out of his voice. Only in junior high and they had such an affect on each other?

Yuuki lowered her brows. "Mm…about a decade…give or take a year."

Dec-holy crap. Was it such a surprise they ended up together?

But more importantly, Cross had probably been by them the whole way, as they evolved from friends, to close friends, to something even closer…all the while wishing for something similar.

He suddenly really wanted a smoke.

"Hey," he looked up, "you're with sempai a lot, aren't you?" He didn't like that smile. "This'll probably come off as creepy, but I just wanted to say thanks," he looked away. "I know he doesn't look it, but sometimes, sempai gets this really lost look in his eyes," she continued softly. "Zero and Onii-chan try their best, but…well, you know how they are," she grimaced. "So," a sip of her orange juice, "_so_," an uncomfortable cough, "I'm glad he has someone to talk with, you know?"

"…"

"Oh, don't give me the 'I wish I wasn't here' look! I'm just saying thanks!"

"It's not that," Yagari bit out, "you just don't seem like the type to notice on something like that."

She flushed, indignant. "Well I do," she huffed. "I worry about him too," she pouted. "Sempai's nice to a lot of people, but that's just it. He doesn't give anything more than that. But," she met his eyes, "I was wondering if you were the different one. The someone he gives more than the 'I'm a nice guy' impression to."

Yagari felt his lips tighten. He wasn't.

"It's about time he found a friend he doesn't have to share, you know?"

He wasn't.

* * *

**O.M.A.K.E.** (Sorry, this is pretty much just KZ)

"Yuuki, who gave him the outfit?"

"Oh, you mean the skirt? I knew you'd be bothered by it," she sighed. "It's Ma-"

"That little..."

"I think she was just pulled into another scheme by your aunt."

Zero growled. "Either way, she might as well have agreed to it."

"I know, I can't believe they'd go that far to make Onii-chan look like an idiot."

"What?" Zero frowned. "No, I can't believe they made him wear something that short! Kaname's precious legs...No one's allowed to see them but me!"

"..." Yuuki breathed deeply, counted to ten, and left the room.

* * *

And that's it for now. I'll probably only add another chapter to this :D Thank you for reading! It must've been one weird ass ride all the way down here XD I kinda feel bad for swinging Yagari around on my crazy whims, but I wanted to give KZ a rest for a bit (not that I seemed to have given them much of one anyway) XD


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